When I was a very little Girl about four years old, I was doing things I thought everyone did. Being so very tiny for my age, I couldn’t reach things even the stool was too short for me. I could use the drawers in the kitchen to climb up and on the counter. When my mother caught me, she would yell and slap me around, knock me to the ground, and sent me to my room. I would put my pillow under the blanket, and crawl under the bed and stay until it got quite again.
I learned to move things, I would look at a box of cereal, and wish it down. I had to be careful about bowls, because the would break. My Mother worked nights all my life. So I would entertain myself, so I wouldn’t wake her. I would practice with my colors moving them and making pictures, it was getting easy to get water out of the sink, all kinds of things. Mother would get so mad, shake me and tell me I was a bad girl.
When I was about five, Mother took me to see the Church elders, there were about four of them. I sat in the middle of the room. They would ask me questions like how do you get things you want, not knowing I told them. They asked me about the puppy that was sick, I told them I touched it and asked Great Father to please make it better. I held the puppy for hours when it started to wake up and cry. One at a time they came and put there hand on my head and prayed. They prayed to God the Father. We got ready to leave the Elders told my mother not to let me do any of those things anymore.
I was starting to get stronger, and hear things people would say without moving there mouths. I kept it very quite, and started staying by myself. Mother took me back to the Church. There were more people there, carrying bibles, and Praying. I was put in the center of the room again. This time I was tied to the chair, I started to cry, so scared. They all started praying, and yelling. They would come up to the chair, touch my head sometime my head would fall to one side or back, and hurt my neck. If I said ouch, or anything they would yell at me more, and shove the chair around the room. It was a day I would never forget. I vowed I would never say anything to anyone again. I would hide.
Grandpa took me up in the mountains. We could see the orange trees filled with oranges, the smell was so wonderful. He put a blanket on the ground for me. Made a circle around me, with small sage fire in the middle. He put small bags of tobacco all around. There was Red, Yellow, Black, White in the four corners. He sat with me for a little, we prayed to the Great Father to help me, to give me strength. I thanked the Great Father for my Grandpa, and this beautiful place. Grandpa told me to sit here and talk to mother earth, father sky and the four corners. Ask them the questions that I have and just wait for answers . I could hum or just be quite. He would not be far just across to keep my fire going. I don’t know when I fell asleep. I awoke in the morn. Grandpa had a snack for me, he didn’t eat.
We talked about my dreams, and what I was told. He asked me if I had the answers to my questions. I was told from this day forward not to tell anyone except Grandpa and his people about my gifts, or who I am. I realized years later that this was my first vision quest.
Grandpa starting taking me out more, we would go to pow wows. I meat some great people, I could talk to them. Grandpa would tell stories to the children.
We went back up on the mountain, it was a beautiful day. Grandpa made a circle again, we said prayers, Grandpa had me sit very quiet and picture us flying together way up in the sky. It was so blue, I just looked up. Soon I was flying, I could look down and see Grandpa sitting there, and next to him was me. We were doves flying in the trees, singing, I was so happy I didn’t want to come down. I felt a touch and heard Grandpa voice Little White Dove come down, we can go another day.